Professional Help

So I take my child to a psychologist for evaluation because of his odd behavior and problems at school. He meets with me after meeting with Hollis.

Dr: X: "So, any bipolar in your family?"

Me: "Diagnosed or undiagnosed? Because my dad is diagnosed, but we have our suspicions about my mom. She seems to be self-medicating with alcohol pretty well though."

Dr. X: "Ok . . . what about other mental illness?"

Me: "Oh yes! What did you have in mind?"

Later

Dr. X: Does Hollis eat a lot?

Me: "Not really – but in our family we don't really hit our stride until college – all the beer and pizza."

Dr. X: "Because Hollis says he only eats chicken nuggets and Lunchables."

Me: That's untrue! He also eats Poptarts, Sprite, and white bread."

I am still waiting on the Department of Social Services to knock on our door.